Haslem is so proud to be Miami. He doesn't even mind being hated. LeBron joked, after the Heat were called thugs on the road in Philadelphia, that Miami should travel in fatigues like those despised University of Miami Hurricane football teams did two decades ago. Haslem loved those rebellious Hurricanes. He was distracted during play early in the season, awed that Michael Irvin was sitting courtside to see Haslem's hated team.

"In my house on Saturdays," he says, "you were a Hurricane or you were homeless."

But, Udonis, you went to college at the rival University of Florida....

Haslem stares at you with those sleepy eyes.

"Business decision," he spits.