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"Beautiful Afro Butterfly" Plans Pink Suit For Heisman

there's hardware out there for a pimp

Yes, we've been off the grid this week, but don't say we've never done anything for you: here's Jacory's appearance on the Dan LeBatard show yesterday, with all the non-Jacory-related parts edited out.  Because Dan LeBatard is an ass.

beautiful afro butterfly

The interview is fabulous, as a departure from dorky white QB-dom and as instructional audio for how, exactly, to live your life at all times: confident, in one of three steps of afro growth (final step: "coming out the cocoon like a beautiful afro butterfly"), and with pink suit and pimp cup handy for Heisman ceremonies.  Also: calling Tim Tebow a liar, but with the condition that you shouldn't because religion is a line you don't cross.

Oh, it's so good to be back.