Miami Vice, Luther Campbell, Trick Daddy, the University of Miami attracts stars to its football program and around the city. For some reason, Miami just has that aura about it.
Hollywood is filled with people who you could see wearing the U if they were to play college football. I don't know if you knew this, but we actually had one guy play for us who’s an actor now, some guy called The Rock.
Now, to play for Miami, you have to have that swagger about you, maybe even a bad boy. Not saying that you have a record of steroid use, cause no Canes have done that....(cough cough George Mira Jr.)
Mark Wahlberg: Middle Linebacker
Though he’s a fun-loving guy, starring in dad comedies, Wahlberg is former bad-boy from the suburbs of Boston. Can’t you seem as a bad-a** linebacker in the early 2000’s, right next to Dan Morgan?
Plus, he is absolutely ripped, especially for his film Pain And Gain, which was based on a true story in Miami. Coincidence?
Terry Crews: Linebacker
Interestingly enough, this actor played college football, but unfortunately attended Western Michigan (closest thing to Miami, right?) and then went on to play seven years in the NFL.
Crews has a loud mouth in his movies, and backs it up with a freakish physique. He also acted as a convict-football-player in the Longest Yard.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Defensive End
His font is bigger, well, because its Arnold. You know dang well that you could imagine him lining up at d-end for Jimmy Johnson’s teams in the mid-80’s, and standing next to Alonzo Highsmith and Winston Moss talking trash at the coin-toss.
His movies also back up his swagger. I mean he was the freakin Terminator, and was in Commando.
Nelly: Running Back
This ripped rapper played a running back in The Longest Yard, and looked like a natural. He’s also not afraid to back up his talk, like when he almost got in a fight with Bow Wow in a celebrity basketball game.
Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson: Defensive Line
You might not know the name, but you know the character. It took the crew of Game Of Thrones two misses before finally getting the casting for Gregor Clegane, aka The Mountain, right by bringing in the Iceland-native Björnsson onto the hit show for season 4.
Why does he would he fit on the Canes’ DL? Easy: size and strength. A former basketball player who has undergone an INCREDIBLE transformation, Björnsson stands 6’9” 397lbs of rock solid muscle. Björnsson has been Europe’s Strongest Man in 5 of the last 6 years, and finished in the top 3 of the World’s Strongest man 6 TIMES before finally winning in 2018. And won the 2018 Arnold Schwarzenegger Classic, breaking the elephant bar deadlift record along the way.
Big. Strong. And surprisingly quick for a guy his size? Sounds like a Canes DL to me.
Dolph Lundgren: Tight End
For you uncultured people who don't watch 80’s movies, this was Ivan Drago in Rocky IV. He also killed Apollo Creed....so that toughness most definitely could’ve worked at Miami.
Just imagine, him and Kellen Winslow in the dual tight-end formation, and Lundgren says to the linebacker before the play, “I must break you.”
Sylvester Stallone: Quarterback
Rocky, Rambo, this guy has played some intimidating parts during his acting career. Him and Vinny Testaverde in the 80’s, that just sounds and looks like Miami.
Plus, he was caught with steroids at one point during his career, so naturally he would’ve fit in just fine in Coral Gables.
The Ultimate Warrior: Defensive Tackle
One of the most memorable wrestlers in history, this crazed-man would’ve fit Miami like a glove. Him and Warren Sapp, side-by-side at the d-tackle position, few more national championships would’ve been ours.
Also, his classic interviews would’ve had former UM President Tad Foote in all kinds of moods.
Who did I miss? Let me know your additions to the list in the comments section.